Searching the world looking for love

God was supposed to be our first example of putting someone first before ourselves and our first practice of selflessness. During my learning and healing process, I learned that the same things that are required in a healthy relationship are the same things required in serving God. You cannot do what you want, look at everything that you want, and you have to abstain from a lot of things that we prefer to do all for the sake of preserving the relationship with the one you care about.

The problem here is that "putting God first" has never been taught in that sense, it's more about doing certain things in hopes that you'll be rewarded for it. We go to church, sing a few gospel songs, put God in our bio on social media, and we do all of this expecting to get the things that we want in life. We have been taught to treat God as if he was a vending machine, put a dollar in and expect something to come out in return. We do these things because we want the relationships, marriages, success in our business adventures, the new house, the new car, and the ability to afford lavish vacations. Our attention and effort to God is not done out of pure and genuine love for him and who he is, it is done out of want and need.

It has also been done WRONG.

A scripture that matters here is Genesis 6:5-7. While we continually focus on financial and physical things to highlight and symbolize God's presence in our lives, God has always cared about and looked for heart and mind. Deeds, behavior, character, heart, humility, and sincerity. Our own creator basically said that he is disgusted with who we are as people and regret making us because of how wicked we are. This is the reason why destruction is imminent and this is the only thing that matters. Money and perceived favoritism does not cancel this out.

We are naturally selfish, and while it is never hard to find someone talking about God and falsely claiming to be his favorite, our deeds tell the truth and always say otherwise. When we are not a world that sincerely that puts God first, there is a high lack of discipline and restraint. There is a lack of striving to be a better person and gain structure in our lives. When people are used to doing whatever they want, when and how they want, and have not practiced restraint, trying to be someone's first practice of it is guaranteed failure, hurt, and disappointment.

For example, a lot of people have a, "I'm single, I can do what I want" mentality. As long as there is no relationship, they are going to deal with whomever and do whatever because there is no real reason to withhold themselves from doing the things they want to do. God said to wait until marriage to have sex, average person has not and will not do that. A world full of people who are doing as they please and collecting experiences with people who won't be around in the future is just a world of people collecting baggage that makes it harder for whomever would want to settle down with them.

Just as a lot of people have gained a lot of sexual experience long before marriage, there is an increased risk of lack satisfaction, risk of comparison, a risk of seeking someone else when needs aren't being met and ultimately leaving for someone else.

Another problem here is that we are too concerned about rewards. I have seen it talked about time and time again how both men and women only want to be good if they are rewarded for it. A relationship, appreciation, loyalty, and love. A lot of people have accumulated hatred in their hearts because we've been improperly taught that being good is going to guarantee good in return. Told to be a good man but the average man can point out instances where women reward the dogs. Told to be a good woman, meanwhile the average woman has a story about a man chasing sexual accessibility. When the world has consistently shown us that we can have everything by being and doing nothing, there is a lack of incentive to stive to be a better person.

-----> This is where the real measurement of good takes place, and many people are not that. The only reason to strive to be better is because of God is this is not what is taught.